Discipline and Gaining Weight

I have tried this before and once I recall a measure of success, but for the most part it has always been failure. My patience widdled away at until I become distracted, leading me to rationalize and finally fully give up. Yes, I'm trying to gain weight again. Though this time the focus has been bent ever so slightly.

I was hospitalized (willingly) due to a malady that has reoccurred off and on for the past 3-4 years. I was told that my health and habits are the only thing that can free me from the recurrence of great pain, discomfort and possibly worse. An operation may help, or it may worsen the condition. I felt left with little option except to make deliberate alterations in my lifestyle.

Chew your food more he said. Eat less, more often. Drink liquids while you eat. Avoid overly processed foods when possible.

So I have a plan. I've always had the idea and I've always failed. So with more at stake finally, maybe my rationalizations will go away and I can gain some true understanding and control over this wry body of mine.

Muscle building 4 times a week. Intense cardio to condition and a full fledged new diet to support the new structure I'm building. Diligence through tracking and monitoring are foreign ideas. Making every movement a deliberate act, filled with purpose and resolve. This isn't failure anymore. It's an ebb and flow, not a sheer drop off. Simple goals, yes. Unobtainable until now, yes.

20 pounds of gain, consistent 7 minute miles, a sprint triathlon, and a better sense of personal capability in my life. Finally. I'm making a plan and it's not about anyone else. It's for me to better me and the methods are for me to determine.